ea: 15 gründe, 1 krüppelkonzern

weil electronic arts dem grössenwahn verfallen und zum m$ der videospielbranche mutiert ist, bringt das hoffnungslos überfrachtete destructoid nun einen coolen artikel:

15 gründe: „ea is pure evil“.

die ersten drei stichpunkte:

1: EA was founded by the descendants of Elizabeth Bathory and Genghis Kahn, whose previously unrecorded (and unbelievable, but just go with it) tryst ended with the spawning of a race of nocturnal bat-like creatures with hairy scales and leathery eyes. They now live underground where their legs have atrophied into useless stubs and they now use mechanical shells to move around. A bit like Daleks, but they’re not Daleks.

2: Electronic Arts was originally believed to be founded by Trip Hawkins, but this is a lie. Hawkins‘ real identity is used car salesman Manny Maplins, who was kidnapped by the true creators of EA, who had his brain removed and replaced with a sparrow which flies around inside his skull, directing his actions. This explains why Hawkins now makes mobile phone games.

3: Contrary to popular belief, it was not Judas that betrayed Jesus to the Romans for thirty pieces of silver. It was actually EA that betrayed him for the NFL license.

wer kein englisch kann, dem hilft der eingebaute translator, welcher sich hinter dem fahnenicon versteckt, sicher weiter.

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